Dear Gladriel,
What Rohan chic, we were simply discussing the borders of our land!! *cough*better than you*cough*

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Just trying to revive this thread, I miss it.

Dear Witch King

Be afraid...
Be VERY afraid!

You'll know who.

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Dear person of little importance who I could easily squish.
How dare you threaten me? I am a king. besides, what are you going to do to me? Kill me? Ha! Are you so ignorant that you don't know that I'm niether living nor dead? And I have a flying steed. With large teeth. Beat that! You are no longer worth my time. Bye bye.
The unfathomably awesome and unconquerable Witch King.

Dear unfathomably *cough* awesome *cough* and *cough* unconquerable *cough* Witch King,
I do not fear you. I have a sword, a hobbit and an X chromosome.
So watch out!!!
You'll soon know who...

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~*Since the invention of the kiss, there have been five kisses that were rated the most passionate, the most pure... This one left them all behind.*~

Dear Witch King

Due to cirumstances beyond my control(involving a bonfire and a very seriously disturbed Steward) I am forced to cancel our spectacular "Mightiest White vs. Mightiest Black Rider" fight on the fields of Pelennor. I apologize deeply. I will try to arrange some kind of replacement, but since I am in a hurry, can not promise anything much.
Have a nice battle!

Gandalf the White,
Wizard formerly known as "the Gray"

P.S. Please do not let your winged beast eat this messenger too, or I will make sure it's the last thing it eats!

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To whom this may concern.
Please be more specific. You said that you had an X chromosome, but who doesn't? Some have three, some have two, and some have only one. There are even some that have two X's and a Y. Some have 1 and a half X's. Well, now that I think of it, some don't ve any X's, they are just YY, but that's not mentioned anywhere in LotR, nor are any of these things. If you are trying to get me to figure out your gender, which I figure you are, since you gave me the peice that is needed, though it is not complete. Then, by saying you have a X chromosome, I figure you are a female, since it would make sence that the X chromosome is "female" in a way, because every one has a X chromosome (with exceptions listed above) and to be male, a Y chromosome is needed. There fore, the alternative, another X chromosome would result in a female.
Can you tell I've had a tutor. You can't imagine how much it cost to make him come to Mordor. Of course, I didn't pay. I kidnapped him and forced him to do my bidding.
And so I conclude my theory with saying you are Eowyn. I figure this is so because you are a woman. Given the three main women roles in LotR, Arwen, Galadriel, and Eowyn, Eowyn is the only choice, since Galadriel has not left her forest, and Arwen does not have a hobbit. Eowyn, or you, I should say, have a hobbit named Merry. You also wield a sword. And, Adding strenght to my theory, I am the one that killed your uncle. Well, actually that was my fell beast, but I wa the one that commmanded it. So of course you would have a grudge on me. Eowyn!
Tutored in deductive reasoning, and biology
Witch King

*Wipes sweat off brow* That's one honkin big letter! I used brain power for that!

Dear Witch King,

I don't CARE if you figured out I was a girl...you would think that the hair and the voice would be good enough for you...


---Eowyn

P.S.: DEATH!!!!!

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Everytime you make a one word post...a cactus dies

Dear Frodo *cough*my love*cough*,
I needed your boxers so I could do a little..... experiment (I can't explain because I fear thay I will confuse you with all my scientific words!).... And um..... it was Legolas who sneaked into your panty drawer! *shifty eyes*
[s]Love[/s] From,
Samwise Gamgee
Still Single Wait.... forget about that... I'm confusing illusion with reality

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Avatar by lamiai

Dear Eowyn.
You filthy maggot! Begone, trecherous fiend! You plague me like none other, and shrivel my eyes right out of my sockets. Wait, do i have eyes? I don't think I do. Do I even have a body, or just some kind of force field thing that keeps my cloak on? Curse you fiend! Curses upo n you and your family for generations unmeasured! May your children be hairless, and yuo decendents missing teeth, ears, and limbs!

Witch King.

PS. DEATH!!!!!!! For you! You cannot hope to slay the perfect evilness that is me!

Witch King,


Just for the record, you're DEAD...


Much Love(NOT!),

---Eowyn

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Everytime you make a one word post...a cactus dies

My dearest Eowyn.
If I'm dead, then why are you writing to me? I do belive that is was you who sent me the first letter. And if I'm dead, then why am I writing to you? Hm?

Your loving nemises
W. K.

WitchKing,

Your assistant must be going through the letters again...filthy little...

,

---Eowyn

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Everytime you make a one word post...a cactus dies

Dear petty litle Eowyn
I'll let you know that the assistant was not going through my letters again. My fell beast Fabio keeps gaurd over them. Your information is wrong!

With as much love as possible
W. K.

WitchKing,

*laughs* Fabio has a one-track mind....

My info. is NOT wrong...


---Eowyn

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Everytime you make a one word post...a cactus dies

*before Arwen meets Aragorn*

'Grandma Galadriel, how much does it cost to send a letter to Narnia?'
'who cares dear, take some money out of Grandpa's wallet... now don't disturb me again, i'm having my hair done'

Dear Queen bloody Susan
i think you'll find I am the beautiful princess soon to be Queen. NOT YOU. you think because some 'talking' lion waltzes up to you and coughs up a furball in your direction that you are and undiscovered 'wunderkind', what ever that is. Well I am an Evenstar... so off my turf! any way... i have a MUCH bigger crown than you and a magic necklace. where's your magic necklace, little *cough* queen. and your such a copycat... i'm older than you... i sooooooooooooooo had this fashion sense first. *sticks tongue out*

yours sincerely
Arwen
Rivendell (aka. much cooler that cair paravell... and finchley)

ps. say hi to your brother for me... the blonde one... i cant remember his name but he's damn fine. You don't find anyone like that in middle earth!

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So come one come all to
This Tragic Affair

♥</center>

My dearest Eowyn.
You are so simple minded, fiend. I know that is I, the Witch King, who is writing to you. If I were a lowly human slave, could I do this? *stabs letter opener into self, pulls it out. The blade is disinegrated* Muahahahahahahahahahahaha! I am the Witch King. Sucker! *blows rasberry*
Yours truly
W.K.