Arwen-Undomiel.com :: View topic - Things a LotR character would NEVER say

Okay.......let me see.......I'll probably stink at this........but oh well.....here goes.

Aragorn:What do you fear then, my lady?
Eowyn:A cage.
Aragorn:Heck woman! What the hell did a cage ever do to you? They're just big hunks of metal that you put people that peeve you off in!
Eowyn:Don't start with me!!!!
Aragorn:Who said I was startin' with you? Your the one rambling on about some frickin' cage......that did nothin' to you!!!!!!!! Hear me woman......NOTHING!!!!!!!
Eowyn:Well at least I'm not afraid of spiders.
Aragorn:SPIDERS!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?Who in this whole frickin' castle told you that I am afraid of spiders??????? *looks around frantically*
Eowyn:That sexy elf over there told me.
Aragorn:LEGOLAS!!!!!!!!!!!
*Legolas edges out the door*
Aragorn:YEAH, YOU BETTER START RUNNIN' ELF BOY......ALL THE WAY HOME TO MAMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Author:	Ms.Gamgee [ June 7th, 2005, 8:39 pm ]
Post subject:	Things a LotR character would NEVER say
Well, what would they never ever say...go ahead Faramir: You wish now, that our places had been exchanged, that I had died and Boromir had lived. Denethor:What, are you kidding? I'm thrilled that greeady loser died!! Faramir:Yeah right you beep you're a dirty liar!! Denethor: What are you talkign about!? All I ever did was try to love you!? Faramir: Yeah, sure!! Why don't I just go back to Osgiliath and kill myelf!!! Denethor: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Pippin: Denethor: Do you think the eyes of the white tower are blind? I- Gandalf: No, of course not. Towers don't have eyes.

Author:	Tirelen [ June 8th, 2005, 8:01 am ]
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During Galadriel's telepathic message to Elrond: GALADRIEL: Do we leave Middle-earth to it's fate? Do we let them stand alone? ELROND: No, but YOU'RE the one sending the army! GALADRIEL: Why do I have to do it? ELROND: Because I did it last time! GALADRIEL: That was over 3000 years ago! ELROND: Picky, picky...

Author:	Cuilwen [ June 8th, 2005, 8:48 am ]
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Hahaha! Lol... Can't think of something myself now... but this is really funny

Author:	Tirelen [ June 8th, 2005, 8:57 am ]
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Hm... when the fellowship are trying to get into Lothlorien (extended edition) and Aragorn is arguing with Haldir: ARAGORN: Come on, pleeeease? HALDIR: No. ARAGORN: Pleeeease with a cherry on top? HALDIR: No. ARAGORN: I'll be your best friend! HALDIR: No. ARAGORN: I'll by you a new bow! A really nice one! HALDIR: Hmmm... okay, but you've gotta throw in that shiny sword of Elendil, too! ARAGORN: WHAT?!?!?! No deal! storms off

Author:	dommi [ June 8th, 2005, 12:56 pm ]
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hahaha thats hilarious! Lemme see if I can think of one.... thinks whoops guess It hought toohard. lol. I will try to think of one later tho.

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Author:	Tanthoronial [ June 8th, 2005, 1:46 pm ]
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In ROTK while in Edoras Aragorn: We have time. Every day Frodo moves closer to Mordor. Gandalf: How do you know that? Aragorn:points towards Mordor Well...there's that flashing arrows that says, "Frodo's here...." Gandalf: That's cheating... Aragorn: I do not fear death, I fear spiders! Ewwww! Get it off! Get it off! violently brushes off the spider from his arm and keeps missing yeah...so they aren't as funny as yours....I tried...hehe

Author:	Ms.Gamgee [ June 8th, 2005, 4:31 pm ]
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Nah...mines aren't funny.

Author:	Larael [ June 8th, 2005, 8:47 pm ]
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Okay.......let me see.......I'll probably stink at this........but oh well.....here goes. Aragorn:What do you fear then, my lady? Eowyn:A cage. Aragorn:Heck woman! What the hell did a cage ever do to you? They're just big hunks of metal that you put people that peeve you off in! Eowyn:Don't start with me!!!! Aragorn:Who said I was startin' with you? Your the one rambling on about some frickin' cage......that did nothin' to you!!!!!!!! Hear me woman......NOTHING!!!!!!! Eowyn:Well at least I'm not afraid of spiders. Aragorn:SPIDERS!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?Who in this whole frickin' castle told you that I am afraid of spiders??????? looks around frantically Eowyn:That sexy elf over there told me. Aragorn:LEGOLAS!!!!!!!!!!! Legolas edges out the door Aragorn:YEAH, YOU BETTER START RUNNIN' ELF BOY......ALL THE WAY HOME TO MAMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Author:	Tirelen [ June 9th, 2005, 5:18 am ]
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LOL Larael Greenleaf that was hilarious!!! Especially the bit at the end! good work!

Author:	Tanthoronial [ June 9th, 2005, 12:00 pm ]
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that was hilarious! Good job! i'll do another one...sooner or later

Author:	Varda [ June 9th, 2005, 12:17 pm ]
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Tirithiel HentaurÃ« wrote: HALDIR: Hmmm... okay, but you've gotta throw in that shiny sword of Elendil, too! ARAGORN: WHAT?!?!?! No deal! storms off You have to remember this is things they wouldn't say. Let me re-phrase this: HALDIR: Hmmm... okay, but you've gotta throw in that shiny sword of Elendil, too! ARAGORN: You got yourself a deal!

Author:	Varda [ June 9th, 2005, 12:19 pm ]
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Boromir and Frodo at Amon Hen: BOROMIR: If you would just lend me the ring... FRODO: Sure, here you go. _____________________________________________________________ Gimli talking to Frodo and Sam when entering Lorien: GIMLI: I can't wait to see all the Elves! Runs ahead of everyone else _____________________________________________________________ That's all I got for now.

Author:	Ms.Gamgee [ June 9th, 2005, 1:57 pm ]
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Larael Greenleaf wrote: Okay.......let me see.......I'll probably stink at this........but oh well.....here goes. Aragorn:What do you fear then, my lady? Eowyn:A cage. Aragorn:Heck woman! What the hell did a cage ever do to you? They're just big hunks of metal that you put people that peeve you off in! Eowyn:Don't start with me!!!! Aragorn:Who said I was startin' with you? Your the one rambling on about some frickin' cage......that did nothin' to you!!!!!!!! Hear me woman......NOTHING!!!!!!! Eowyn:Well at least I'm not afraid of spiders. Aragorn:SPIDERS!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?Who in this whole frickin' castle told you that I am afraid of spiders??????? looks around frantically Eowyn:That sexy elf over there told me. Aragorn:LEGOLAS!!!!!!!!!!! Legolas edges out the door Aragorn:YEAH, YOU BETTER START RUNNIN' ELF BOY......ALL THE WAY HOME TO MAMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Awsome...very funny.

Author:	Tirelen [ June 9th, 2005, 5:56 pm ]
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Not so much funny as very very silly... LOL if Boromir had taken the ring to Gondor and Faramir had wanted it and stolen it... FARAMIR: Ha ha it's mine noooow! BOROMIR: Hey no fair! FARAMIR: NYAH NYAH FINDERS KEEPERS LOSERS WEEPERS! BOROMIR: You didn't find it, you stole it! I found it in the first place! FRODO: Actually, I FOUND IT!!! BILBO: evil demonic face IT'S MINE! GOLLUM: pounces Bilbo and steals ring MYYY PRRECCIOUSS! BOROMIR: to faramir NOW SEE WHAT YOU DID! WAAAAH!! I'M TELLIN DAD ON YOOOO! Okay this one was rather silly but somehow I can imagine it happening...

Author:	Larael [ June 9th, 2005, 6:04 pm ]
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okay........I came up with some other ones......I don't think they are as good as the first one though. Gollum:My Preeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeecious!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Frodo:Will you shut up already, about the preciuos. I thought I already told you that its mine!!!!!!!!!!! Gollum:Please can I haveses the Precious!?!?!!??!?!! Frodo:Heck no!!!!!!!!!!! Gollum:Please with ice cream on top? Frodo:ponders no. Gollum: Please with ice cream, and sprinkles on top? Frodo:That does sound good but...........no I can't. Gollum:Please with ice cream, sprinkles, and a ............cherry on top. Frodo:AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH you know my weakness for cherries. GIVE ME THE CHERRIES!!!!!!!!!!!!Here you can have this cheap hunk of gold. throws ring at Gollum Gollum:Finally!!!!!!I haveses the-Frodo:Wheres my cherries. Golum:I didn't haves any. Frodo:You little.......... Gollum begins to run Frodo:YOU CAN RUN BUT YOU CAN'T HIDE!!!!!!!!!! Aragorn:Legolas, what do your elf eyes see? Legolas:Arwen.......and she's holding a banner.......I can't quite make it out........if she would move just a bit to the right. Ahhhhhhh perfect.......it says "Legsie.......Legsie......I love you!!!!!!!! Screw you Aragorn!!!!!!" Aragorn:Liar, liar pants on fire. Legolas:Oh wait.......she has another banner it says "Legsie marry me!!!!! Aragorn you are such a !@#$% you never listen to me." Aragorn:What!?!!?!?!?! Legolas:Hey she digs me.........catch ya later I got a hot chick waiting for me! Legolas rides down hill Aragorn:Yeah well there are plenty of Gondorian chicks waiting for me............who wear grey........and black........and brown.......awwwwwww man this sucks. Gandalf:The board is set. The pieces are moving. Aragorn: Thats it, old man we don't have time for a stupid game of chess!!!!!!!! We are going without you!!!!!!! Gandalf: You can't go without me. Aragorn; Oh yes we can!!!!!! Gandalf: Fine go, but I will not have mercy upon you, when I find you all lost in some forest curled up in a fetal position crying fo your Mama's. Aragorn:Oh forget you.......lets go. Everyone leaves, except Gandalf Gandalf:I'll give 'em a day. Gandalf rides through Fangorn Forest Aragorn:Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeelp meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!! Gandalf finds the fellowship lying on the ground in the forest. Legolas:I want my mooooooooooooooooooooommy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sucks thumb 'k there ya go.............not that great.

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Author:	Elenya [ June 9th, 2005, 9:30 pm ]
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Gandalf: You didn't think I'd miss your uncle Bibo's birthday, did you? Frodo, muttering: Well, we were hoping Gandalf: What did you say? Frodo: Nothing! (looks innocent)