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Post subject: Re: LOTR crimes  Posted: January 7th, 2016, 3:44 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005
Posts: 19521
Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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Oh gosh as much as I would hate to clip his wings... I could not bare to bring myself to kiss arwen... So...
1. I would never kiss arwen in front of Aragorn
2. I would admit to stealing a lovely keg of ale from the prancing poney
3. I would get caught cliping Gwaihir's wings so he can't fly
1. Tell Gandalf the white he looked better in grey
2. Replace Legolas' arrows with nerf darts
3. Convince Eomer to attack Edoras because Saruman has taken over Theoden's mind.
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Post subject: Re: LOTR crimes Posted: January 7th, 2016, 4:40 pm |
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Joined: 21 November 2014
Posts: 3922
Location: Angband & Mordor
Country: 
Gender: Female
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1. I would admit to telling Gandalf the White that he looked better in grey.
2. I would get caught replacing Legolas' arrows with Nerf darts.
3. I would never convince Éomer to attack Edoras because Saruman has taken over Théoden's mind.
1. Save Gollum from falling into the volcano and thus save the One Ring.
2. Put laxative powder in Sam and Frodo's lembas.
3. Warn the Witch-King that a woman has snuck into the Rohirrim cavalry.
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Tevildo, Prince of Cats
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Post subject: Re: LOTR crimes Posted: January 8th, 2016, 1:49 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005
Posts: 19521
Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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1. I would never save golum or the ring
2. I would admit to puting laxitive in the lembes
3. I would get caught telling the witch king a women has snuck into the ranks of the rohirim
1. Tie the fell beasts up at the horse hitching post
2. Leave a barel of snot in place of the rum in the green dragon
3. Put worms in Elrond's lembes
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Post subject: Re: LOTR crimes Posted: January 10th, 2016, 11:46 pm |
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Joined: 21 November 2014
Posts: 3922
Location: Angband & Mordor
Country:
Gender: Female
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1. I would get caught tying the fell beasts up at the horse hitching post.
2. I would never leave a barrel of snot in place of the rum in the Green Dragon Inn.
3. I would admit to putting worms in Elrond's lembas.
1. Tell Sauron he has an eye infection and offer to put drops in his eye.
2. Steal a swan ship and sail to the Undying Lands.
3. Destroy Gandalf's letter before the Hobbits have a chance to read it.
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Tevildo, Prince of Cats
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Post subject: Re: LOTR crimes Posted: January 11th, 2016, 2:53 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005
Posts: 19521
Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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1. I would get caught telling Sauron he had an eye infection and offering to put drops in it
2. I would admit to stealing a swan ship and sailing to the undying lands
3. I would never destroy Gandalf's letter before the hobbits had a chance to read it.
1.Turn a thousand ferrel goats loose in fangorn forest... Hungry ferrel goats.
2. Tell the orcs that loco weed tasted like fresh meat
3. Make willow bark tea out of Old Man Willow's bark
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Post subject: Re: LOTR crimes Posted: January 11th, 2016, 6:34 pm |
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Joined: 21 November 2014
Posts: 3922
Location: Angband & Mordor
Country:
Gender: Female
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1. I would never turn a thousand hungry feral goats loose in Fangorn Forest.
2. I would admit to telling the Orcs that loco weed tastes like fresh meat.
3. I would get caught making willow bark tea out of Old Man Willie's bark.
1. Serve a live-eel pie to Denethor for dinner.
2. Use the Horn of Gondor as a bubble maker.
3. Sue Bill Ferny for selling sway-backed ponies.
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Tevildo, Prince of Cats
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Post subject: Re: LOTR crimes Posted: January 11th, 2016, 8:56 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005
Posts: 19521
Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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Gosh... That's hard because I would probably do all of them... Lol. I guess...
1. I would admit to serving denathor a live eel pie
2. I would get caught using the horn of Gondor for a buble maker
3. I would "never" sue Bill Ferny for selling sway backed ponies
1. Eat denathor's live eel pie
2. Steal Bill Ferny's sway back ponies
3. Decorate the horn of Gondor (Bubble blower) with pink glittery stuff.
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Post subject: Re: LOTR crimes Posted: January 14th, 2016, 6:56 pm |
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Joined: 21 November 2014
Posts: 3922
Location: Angband & Mordor
Country:
Gender: Female
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1. I would never eat Denethor's live eel pie.
2. I would get caught stealing Bill Ferny's sway-backed ponies.
3. I would admit to decorating the Horn of Gondor with pink glittery stuff.
1. Have Sam carry Frodo all the way from Amon Hen to Mount Doom.
2. Enlist in the Rohirrim cavalry so you could steal their horses.
3. Help Melkor and Ungoliant poison the Two Trees.
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Tevildo, Prince of Cats
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Post subject: Re: LOTR crimes Posted: January 17th, 2016, 12:50 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005
Posts: 19521
Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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1. I Would admit to having sam cary Frodo
2. I would get caught enlisting in the rohirim so I could steal the horses
3. I would never help Melkor and Ungoliant poisen the two trees
1. Feed a silmaril to a mumakil
2. Throw the one ring in the deepest part of the ocean
3. Stuff Mt. Doom with popcorn and make it rain popcorn jn the land of mordor.
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Post subject: Re: LOTR crimes Posted: January 22nd, 2016, 3:08 am |
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Joined: 21 November 2014
Posts: 3922
Location: Angband & Mordor
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Gender: Female
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1. I would never feed a Silmaril to a Mûmakil.
2. I would admit to throwing the One Ring into the deepest part of the ocean.
3. I would get caught stuffing Mt. Doom with popcorn so that it rains popcorn in Mordor.
1. Put dishwashing liquid in Ecthelion's fountain so that Gothmog is suffocated by the bubbles.
2. Send Pippin on an quest to steal the broken Horn of Gondor so it can be repaired.
3. Use the rotten tomatoes in Denethor's kitchen to pelt the onlookers at Aragorn's arrival in Minas Tirith.
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Tevildo, Prince of Cats
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Post subject: Re: LOTR crimes Posted: January 24th, 2016, 2:55 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005
Posts: 19521
Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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I would admit to putting dishsoap inEcthelion's fountain so Gothmog suffocates
I would never send Pippin on a mission for the hornnof gondor to be fixed
I would get caught using rotton tomatoes to oelt the crowd at Aragorn's arrival to Minis tirith
1. Give Boromir a machine gun and turn him loose in Mordor
2. Let Arwen drive a lambergini
3. Show Legolas how to opporate a missile launcher
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Post subject: Re: LOTR crimes Posted: January 25th, 2016, 3:05 pm |
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Joined: 21 November 2014
Posts: 3922
Location: Angband & Mordor
Country:
Gender: Female
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1. I would never give Boromir a machine gun and turn him loose in Mordor.
2. I would admit to letting Arwen drive a Lamborghini.
3. I would get caught showing Legolas how to operate a missile launcher.
1. Open the gates of Minas Tirith so the Witch-King can enter the city.
2. Warn Saruman that Gríma means to kill him.
3. Give Lurtz a special arrow to kill Boromir more easily.
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Tevildo, Prince of Cats
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Post subject: Re: LOTR crimes Posted: January 25th, 2016, 4:18 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005
Posts: 19521
Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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Oh... Hard ones
1. I would get caught opening the gates of minis tirith for the ring wraith.
2. I would Never warn Sauron Grima is going to kill him.
3. I would admit to Giving Lurtz a special arrow to Kill Boromir more quickly. (It would be less painful for boromir)
1. Kill Lurtz and take his place as head uruk.
2. Eat all Golum's fish so he starves
3. Make a fake "One Ring" and offer it to Boromir.
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Post subject: Re: LOTR crimes Posted: January 25th, 2016, 9:36 pm |
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Joined: 21 November 2014
Posts: 3922
Location: Angband & Mordor
Country:
Gender: Female
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1. I would get caught killing Lurtz and taking his place as head Uruk-hai.
2. I would admit to eating all of Gollum's fish so he starves.
3. I would never make a fake One Ring and offer it to Boromir.
1. Steal a baby warg and keep it as a pet.
2. Put itching powder in Gimli's helmet.
3. Add laxatives to Denethor's food.
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Tevildo, Prince of Cats
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Post subject: Re: LOTR crimes Posted: January 26th, 2016, 10:19 pm |
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Joined: 04 November 2005
Posts: 19521
Location: In a pudle on Naboo with dragon kind and ents and Jedi and wolves living in the Last Homely House!
Gender: Male
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I would admit to stealing a baby warg and keeping it as a pet
I would never put itching powelder in Ginli's helmet
I would get caught putting laxative in Denathor's food
1. Shave Balin's beard
2. Glue Ballin's shaved beard on Elrond
3. Shave Arwen's eyebrows and tatoo them back on.
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Post subject: Re: LOTR crimes Posted: January 27th, 2016, 12:54 pm |
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Joined: 21 November 2014
Posts: 3922
Location: Angband & Mordor
Country:
Gender: Female
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1. I would admit to shaving off Balin's beard.
2. I would get caught gluing Balin's beard on Elrond.
3. I would never shave off Arwen's eyebrows and tattoo them back on.
1. Apply for the position of head chef in Denethor's kitchens so you can poison him.
2. Ask Boromir to help you steal the shards of Narsil.
3. Join the Nazgûl and help Sauron regain the One Ring.
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Tevildo, Prince of Cats
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