Here is a poem I wrote while I was in the car on the way to vacation. I need some feedback on it, and ways I can make it better. I'm still not great at poetry :



The soft, calming whispers in my ear when silence surround me,
And loneliness closes in around me.

The ones that walk beside me when no one else will,
To the ends of the earth and miles beyond.

The lights that turn on to guide me when I’m lost in the darkness,
Alone and afraid with no one to show me the way.

The ones that I turn to when everything has gone wrong,
And I just can’t bear to go on.

The wind beneath my wings when I feel like I’m falling,
Plummeting down towards the cold depths below.

My hope

My strength

My life

My angels

My sisters...

My friends.

Sam

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<center>
Can't take the Kid from the Fight take the Fight from the Kid
engaged to Tyson Ritter-my love forever
<a href="http://www.dance-to-this-beat.net"> Dance to this Beat</a>
</center>

its beautiful Sam!!! your very good! don't let anyone tell you anthing other then that!

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<center>“Envy consists in seeing things never in themselves, but only in their relations. If you desire glory, you may envy Napoleon, but Napoleon envied Caesar, Caesar envied Alexander, and Alexander, I daresay, envied Hercules, who never existed.”
at one point, I was alejandrah.

aw...thanks! *is happy, despite sore teeth from stupid orthodontist* Well, I am hoping to be a writer when I get older. Not poetry though. Hopefully write a novel someday...

Sam

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<center>
Can't take the Kid from the Fight take the Fight from the Kid
engaged to Tyson Ritter-my love forever
<a href="http://www.dance-to-this-beat.net"> Dance to this Beat</a>
</center>

You should.....

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"Holmes is a little too scientific for my tastes -- it approaches to cold-bloodedness"

Gee, thanks *hugs Leaha*

Sam

_________________
<center>
Can't take the Kid from the Fight take the Fight from the Kid
engaged to Tyson Ritter-my love forever
<a href="http://www.dance-to-this-beat.net"> Dance to this Beat</a>
</center>

*sniffs* That's beautiful Sam! Really, you should be a writer!
I wish I could write poems like that..in English. (2nd language) I would only embarass myself..

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O children, lift up your voice, lift up your voice,
Children, rejoice, rejoice..



It doesn't matter you don't believe in God, He believes in you.

Wow...I really didn't think it was that good... Thank you all so much. *hugs*

And I'm sure you wouldn't embarrass yourself! You could develop them here with the help of all of your AU friends!

Sam

_________________
<center>
Can't take the Kid from the Fight take the Fight from the Kid
engaged to Tyson Ritter-my love forever
<a href="http://www.dance-to-this-beat.net"> Dance to this Beat</a>
</center>

Haha, okay.. I'll post something if I'll get to write it down.. Most of the time it depends on the moment to get inspiration I feel like I'm talking nonsense now:closedeyes:

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O children, lift up your voice, lift up your voice,
Children, rejoice, rejoice..



It doesn't matter you don't believe in God, He believes in you.

I'm sure it will be lovely I can't wait to read it

Sam

_________________
<center>
Can't take the Kid from the Fight take the Fight from the Kid
engaged to Tyson Ritter-my love forever
<a href="http://www.dance-to-this-beat.net"> Dance to this Beat</a>
</center>

That was really great, Sam. Good work! *claps hands*

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Come to the Dark Side...we have Jim Moriarty

Thankies gollum! I appreciate ur comments!

Sam

_________________
<center>
Can't take the Kid from the Fight take the Fight from the Kid
engaged to Tyson Ritter-my love forever
<a href="http://www.dance-to-this-beat.net"> Dance to this Beat</a>
</center>