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Stranger *Edits name* :P http://arwen-undomiel.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=48&t=11398 |
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Author: | Jax Nova [ September 30th, 2006, 11:36 am ] |
Post subject: | Stranger *Edits name* :P |
Stranger. What would I see if I looked through your eyes? Would it be dark as the night skies? Or would it be bright shining out love, Like radiant rays from the bright sun above? Why is it always so hard just to see, See through your eyes what you want me to be? Why can't I read you, your a mystery to me, Why can't I see what you want me to be?! Do you look onward and hope for the day, I will give in and you hear me say? "I'll do what you want even if it's not fair," "I'm at the point where I don't really care." Or do you look down and condemn me each day, Wishing to scold as I go on my way. Or perhaps in some mysterious way, You actually are proud but you just never say. I stand there and stair time after time, The look in your eye says that I did the crime. I touch your cold heart and all that I see, Is yourself condemning me. A tear runs down this cheek of mine, Leaving there an ever faint line. A tear runs down your cheek as well, At the same time the tear drops fell. I walk to the left you take the same path, When I get angry you build up wrath. I look in your eyes and I see my fear, So why can't I read you... Stranger in the mirror! |
Author: | ethelfleda [ September 30th, 2006, 11:44 am ] |
Post subject: | |
hey! i really like it. maybe you could come up with a different title though - i love the way the poem seems to be directed at someone else and then turns back on the poet at the end, but the title kind of prefigures that so some of the impact it lost. just a thought. it's a great poem though. |
Author: | Captain Jack [ September 30th, 2006, 1:38 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
I like it! It's a great poem! ^_^ |
Author: | Jax Nova [ October 2nd, 2006, 3:28 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
eowyn of ithilien wrote: hey! i really like it. maybe you could come up with a different title though - i love the way the poem seems to be directed at someone else and then turns back on the poet at the end, but the title kind of prefigures that so some of the impact it lost. just a thought. it's a great poem though. yeah I thought of that myself when I gave it the title... but I was unsure whether to change it or not. But glad you liked it. Captain Jack wrote: I like it! It's a great poem! ^_^
Thanks. ![]() |
Author: | pip&leggyluvr [ October 2nd, 2006, 6:12 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
OMG I LUV IT!!! I wasnt expecting it 2 be u at all.......ur image in the mirror!! AHH!! this is so good, & a GREAT idea!! ![]() |
Author: | Jax Nova [ October 3rd, 2006, 1:48 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
lol thanks. Glad you liked it. ![]() |
Author: | pip&leggyluvr [ October 3rd, 2006, 4:09 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
sure thing! I wanted 2 type more last night, but Mom started yelling at me to get off. lol ![]() ![]() ![]() |
Author: | Jax Nova [ October 4th, 2006, 6:42 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
lol don't worry it makes sense to me. And thanks, I'll do my best. |
Author: | pip&leggyluvr [ October 4th, 2006, 9:40 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
ur welcum! ![]() |
Author: | ~*ArwenEvenstar*~ [ October 6th, 2006, 7:52 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
I like it!! Very good perspective. ![]() ![]() ![]() |
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