Not bad.
Keep it up!
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| Random amature poetry#7 http://arwen-undomiel.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=48&t=6274 |
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| Author: | Shigure [ February 19th, 2006, 11:15 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Random amature poetry#7 |
The Dark Brother Cursed by Fate Discarded by the Gods Entrapped by his own design Bound to his words Clad in black Passing like a shadow He changes things as he passes And he restores things to their original Shrouded in mystery Cloaked in secrets Entralled to omission Delivered from unknown He leaves no trace of his passing He vanishes with no sign Yet all know when he goes Somehow they know where he's been Weary and alone Doomed to this fate Unable to unbind the fortold Enslaved to his own vow Power wanted Responisblity given Fear unallowed Death uncertain |
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| Author: | Jax Nova [ February 20th, 2006, 4:13 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Not bad. Keep it up!
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| Author: | Guest [ March 3rd, 2006, 9:51 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
I liked it. I think it should have been a little more flowy, it was a little choppy. Do you understand? |
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