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All my poetry
http://arwen-undomiel.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=48&t=9018		 Page 1 of 3
Author:  lady_E [ June 16th, 2006, 11:49 am ]
Post subject:  All my poetry
Well i wrote a poem...tell me what you think, Criticize me as much as you like

[font=Arial, sans-serif]So young[/font]

You were crying out
Looked so so alone
Why didn't you give up
And come back home

Only fourteen, So young
Look onto my Saviour
And in him, you'll be strong
Stronger then you think

He is there for you every day
Don't turn from him again
Don't...i say, don't turn away
Be strong every single day


Don't believe those liars
They will tear you apart
Will they be there for you
As your dear life falls apart
Author:  Fíriel_18190 [ June 20th, 2006, 5:20 am ]
Post subject: 
I really like what this poem is about and you expressed it very well :)
Author:  lady_E [ June 20th, 2006, 8:51 am ]
Post subject: 
Thanks ;)
Author:  Fíriel_18190 [ June 20th, 2006, 11:21 am ]
Post subject: 
np, I think it's an important topic and that's what I really like :)
Author:  lady_E [ June 26th, 2006, 1:58 pm ]
Post subject: 
Thanks again

Here's another poem!

Met you when i was 10
You were my best friend
Now the years have past
Sadly our friendship didn't last

We went our own separate ways
But i still pray for you everyday
If i had one wish for single you
You wouldn't know what to do

You have been a part of my life
But you filled it up with alot of strife
One day we will see each other again
Maybe we will call each other, friends
Author:  Calathiel [ June 26th, 2006, 3:09 pm ]
Post subject: 
Nice poems, but in the last sentences I think you forgot the words
"we" and "each"

One day we will see each other again
Maybe we will call eachother, friends

Sounds a little weird without 'em :P
Author:  lady_E [ June 27th, 2006, 2:54 pm ]
Post subject: 
Calathiel wrote:
Nice poems, but in the last sentences I think you forgot the words
"we" and "each"

One day we will see each other again
Maybe we will call eachother, friends

Sounds a little weird without 'em :P


Thanks *goes off to edit poem*
Author:  Lady Elenriel [ June 27th, 2006, 3:11 pm ]
Post subject: 
Wow, I love both poems lady_Ëarwen. I love how you captured the emotions so well in both poems. Great work! :-D
Author:  Fíriel_18190 [ June 27th, 2006, 3:36 pm ]
Post subject: 
wow a very beautiful poem again with a very nice topic. Great job lady_Eärwen, I love your poems
Author:  lady_E [ June 28th, 2006, 8:06 am ]
Post subject: 
Aww, thanks you two ;)
Author:  Guest [ July 2nd, 2006, 7:23 pm ]
Post subject: 
you're poems are really great - you should be writing more. you're not afraid to use "big words", which is great cause it gives the poem depth :)
Author:  lady_E [ July 3rd, 2006, 8:24 am ]
Post subject: 
Thank you so much for all the comments you guys, maybe i shall write more poetry
Author:  Guest [ July 3rd, 2006, 6:20 pm ]
Post subject: 
do it!
Author:  lady_E [ July 4th, 2006, 2:48 pm ]
Post subject: 
Ok
[EDIT] I wote a poem about Arwen and Aragorn, as you may see Arwen is the narrator [/EDIT]

So dark, so weary
So tired of trying
Just want to give up
As i lay here dying

Will i ever see you again
Will we always be apart
When you went away
You broke my heart

Tonight will you dream
Will you dream of me
I will dream of you
Of what we used to be
Author:  Fíriel_18190 [ July 4th, 2006, 4:22 pm ]
Post subject: 
wow, sooo beautiful, I really DO like it.. :)
Author:  Guest [ July 4th, 2006, 4:32 pm ]
Post subject: 
it's really beautiful, but there's kinda something wrong in the last verse. you have dream - me - be - me, which might sound a bit.. you know... odd, if you think about your rhyming in the other verses. just a tip - other than that it's great :)
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