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 Post subject: Four Sonnets (02 Added)
PostPosted: August 28th, 2009, 6:32 pm 
Maia
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Sonnet 01

The sun sets on (for us or them I don't
know) a sleepy green world that is electric.
And you don't know to feel your hand and face,
Be held in those lights, hold you here, electric.
Our lips brush. You whisper thunder and what
I know is lightning (who crawls down my spine
and grabs inside) that I call love. He comes
from your pale skin, so soft in intimacy.
I(you) don't want to wake up from (if we
do someday I can't see) you(me) together
in this sleepy green world that is alive
from each shiver and breath of desire
that comes (even one caress under a
changing star) from the blue nights and love electric.




Sonnet 02

What can I say to you when the sky is
black (to you) when the sky is cold and I
can't speak a word then. The sky is silent
and in the water a moon is (silent)
watching with the black moss in the trees decayed.
All the world (is with me and you) is in
a shade of charcoal noise and love and color
that will not fade or bleed away (it won't).
Evey second is unsaid and I can't say
a word then why would I speak (whisper) and
break it why would this moment end or
(would I speak) the simple silent air to be
broken when the world is held by you (you).
And what thunder could break what is held by you?



Sonnet 03

The morning sun is good (and moon)
and its fingers stretch towards me. And it
is so good (beautiful) when it touches
when warmth and life and breath all come together
there. You are so good (O green world!) this day
your hours like many branches of a tree
who (moving in a breeze) hide a secret moment
of truth of love (a laugh I've never thought
before, hiding). The evening moon is (me)
numbing. It is light and broken glass shattered
that crosses me with stretching fingers. All
of it is so good and I must sing out
and shout (aloud) a shifting song of shadows
and lights walking over you (O green world!).




Sonnet 04

Crying night I'm feeling you (you're feeling
me) You're diluting me with light (with bleeding
noise a bleeding light (You so alive and warm and
pulsing) who burns when it pulses in me. O
morning sun O northern star O your hand
your blazing fingers so soft they fall with
mine they blend together (dilute each other).
Why is the world so loud tonight (through you)?
Tonight in the dark night that is you (me)?
Why creeps the world between us, the day into
this perfect (our blazing fingers touch (sleep)
that we hide ourselves (we drown ourselves) in
loving clouds of starlight, that we cover
ourselves in love slipping from the crying night?


Last edited by Witch_King_of_Angmar on September 12th, 2009, 6:16 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: August 28th, 2009, 9:50 pm 
Istari
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Touching.
I have to say the first one is almost liquid (although a little more chaotic and overlapping emotions), it makes the reader (or at least me) feel contemplative but not in a normal sense, I love the fact that it is not linear.
The second is a lot more overwhelming with emotion, and more chaotic, the fire imagery expressing passion wonderfully... I have to say I like the first one more only because the contrast of emotion in the second is only too familiar to me but overlooking my own emotions (that don't quite matter to you, the author) the second one is absolutely amazing.

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PostPosted: August 31st, 2009, 10:18 pm 
Maia
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Mornie utulie wrote:
Touching.
I have to say the first one is almost liquid (although a little more chaotic and overlapping emotions), it makes the reader (or at least me) feel contemplative but not in a normal sense, I love the fact that it is not linear.
The second is a lot more overwhelming with emotion, and more chaotic, the fire imagery expressing passion wonderfully... I have to say I like the first one more only because the contrast of emotion in the second is only too familiar to me but overlooking my own emotions (that don't quite matter to you, the author) the second one is absolutely amazing.



Thank you very much! :-D

The second one isn't really a love poem, per se, it's also oriented around the emotions nature causes as the first, but a little left over infatuation got mixed in their and made the whole thing turn into a rather crazy meditation on both. :confused2:


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PostPosted: September 1st, 2009, 3:54 pm 
Istari
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if you ask me I'm all for an overdose of emotion ^.^
plus...nature could always force herself through to love-related affairs and it makes a great way to describe obstacles without sounding redundant

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PostPosted: September 7th, 2009, 4:32 pm 
Maia
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I added the first one that I dug up...


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