Arwen: You saw my son!
Elrond:Wait...how do you know it was your son?
Arwen:Excuse me... *glares at Elrond*
Elrond:I mean, it could be Eowyn's son for all you know...
Arwen:DADDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *tackles Elrond*


lol...not my best...

Oh... I forgot to look at this topic. They're all great! I absolutely loved the one about Arwen and PMS. :lol::lol:

Some thoughts on the Council.

ELROND : Middle Earth stands upon the brink of destruction. Of course, I couldn't care less about that, because I'm leaving for the Undying Lands in about... 5 minutes. I just wanted to see the look on Gandalfs when I said that. Mhm... Mhaha... Hahahahaha! Hihihi! Priceles!!!!(starts laughing histericaly and then suddenly stops) OK, I'm good. Elves, move out!
Arwen pools up her hood, picks up a lantern and follows the Elves.
ELROND : Oh, except for you Arwen. You're staying here with Aragorn. I think you have a great future with him. Hihihi! Hm! Well, good bye everyone, enjoy your certain doom. (goes off singing cheerfully : All shall fade! All shall fade!)

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ARAGORN : The One Ring answers to Sauron alone. It has no other master.
BOROMIR : And what would a mere Ranger know about that?
LEGOLAS : Yeah, you tell him Boromir! (sticks out his tongue at Aragorn).

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LEGOLAS : This is no mere Ranger! He is Aragorn, son of Arathorn.
BOROMIR : Isildur's heir?! Really?! OMG! OMG! I can't breathe! Oh. my captain. my King, bid me do something for you, please, pleaseeee!
ARAGORN : (pats Boromirs head) Good boy, Boromir! Now go fetch me the Ring!



OK, not so good, but I just wanted to keep this thread going. It's hillarious!

Aragorn: like oh my god!!! (rEALLY HIGH PITCHED VOICE)

Merenwen! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! LOVED IT! "Good Boromir, now fetch me the ring..." HAHAHAHAHA!

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Merenwen, 'twas a good one.

Sauron: I think I'm getting soppy ...
Saruman: Sire, you should see a pshychiatriatrist. He knows how to help people with such probelms.
Sauron: Is he edible?


Told ya I have no clue how to make a joke ...

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<center>[font=Times New Roman]<img src="http://tinyurl.com/63ongu"><br><br>From sorrow & pain I find my strength ... the more pain I feel, the more I see /// July the 4th 2008, first day of my life...<br><br>I met Eru on September 5th 2006 ♥ (and April 15th 2008!)<br><br>Censorship Causes Blindness</center>[/font]

hope you like it:

Legolas: who shall call them from the grey twilight, the forgotten peop
Aragorn: Oow shut up Legs, stop talking for a second.
Gimli: Yeah, why do you always have to say things like that, so mystic and stuff..
Legolas: But I..
Aragorn: You don't have to talk you know
Legolas: It's just..
Gimli: I could say things like that to you know, I only never get the chance because you're always talking!!
Legolas: BUT ELROND ASKED ME IF I WOULD TELL THE ROHIRRIC CAMP WHAT WE WERE ABOUT TO DO!!
Gimli and Aragorn: oow
Elrond: Aragorn *with an ice cold voice* I hope you understand you can forget about that sword now. And you can also forget Arwen, I'll find another man for her*looks at Eomer*
Aragorn: *beep*, Legs why didn't you tell me that!!!

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well this is definetley interesting....

OMG hilarious

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<center>[font=Times New Roman]<img src="http://tinyurl.com/63ongu"><br><br>From sorrow & pain I find my strength ... the more pain I feel, the more I see /// July the 4th 2008, first day of my life...<br><br>I met Eru on September 5th 2006 ♥ (and April 15th 2008!)<br><br>Censorship Causes Blindness</center>[/font]

Merenwen: that first one will be a classic!
Lhunardaien: that's great!

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Bob Seger 11/19;Celtic Thunder 9/29
Gettysburg 150th!!!

After the Battle of Helm's Deep:
Aragorn: *whispering* I see dead people.
Legolas: *mumbling* And they call me Captain Obvious...
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Denethor: You know Boromir, you should be more like your brother Faramir!
*Both brothers stare blankly at father*
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After the death of Theodred:
Theoden: *singing and dancing gleefully* Ding dong my son is dead! Which old son? The stupid son! Ding dong my stupid son is dead!...

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Thank you very much. I wasn't totally sure about it

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:lol::lol: This is hilarious!

Wow, thanks, I'm glad you like it!
I seem to have lost my inspiration though.

Because I do so well with baddies... (look at page 7 for my previous ones, lol)... here's another orc-featured one.

Scene: The Black Gates. Two orcs are keeping watch on the eve that the Ring is destroyed, which they obviously don't know...

Orc 1: ... and I was like, "Honey, you know that I cannot keep control of the kids, it's their instinct to kill all in their path." And she was like, "Now you listen to me, Shagurth! You will teach those kids right now not to kill the slaves!" And I was like, "Honey, I cannot do that, I would be disrupting their education!"
Orc 2: *rolls eyes* Women. They're impossible. You should just do like me, Shagurth. My wife nagged so much that I finally decided to just eat her. Kids and I have been better off ever since.
Orc 1: Maybe I should, maybe I should... but I don't want the neighbors talking.
Orc 2: Where do you live?
Orc 1: Near Nurn.
Orc 2: Oh, that's not a good place at all. I'd suggest moving up to Udun. Much nicer there. Neighbors mind their own business.
Orc 1: Hmm, maybe, maybe... hey, is that Shrimp?
Orc 2: Yea, looks like Shrimp... *snickers* His parents must have really hated him.
Orc 1: Well, he *is* shrimpy... hey Shrimp. What news?
Shrimp the Shrimpy Orc: News from the Master. A large host is moving in, and should be here within an hour.
Orc 2: Wow, really? What host?
Shrimp: Some men led by this so-called King Aragorn Elessar of Gondor.
Orc 1: Hey, hey, wasn't that the guy the Boss had us looking for for the last few years?
Orc 2: Yea, I remember the memo... was huge news when Isildur's heir was found to be still around.
Orc 1: I thought it was all a pile of Mumak poo.
Orc 2: Obviously not... alright, Shrimp, we've got the message. We'll keep an eye out.
*Shrimp leaves*
Orc 1: ... soo.... now what? We just... wait?
Orc 2: ... I guess...
Orc 1: ... so... how big you reckon this army is?
Orc 2: *shrugs* Don't really care. We've got plenty. And if we don't, the kids can help us.
Orc 1: *smiles* Yea... my five boys would love that... they've been training on the neighborhood kids for a while... I think they'd be ready.
Orc 2: My boys are good too... though one my daughters wants to join in.
Orc 1: Really?
Orc 2: Yup. Not sure what to make of it...
Orc 1: Eh, just let her. Better for her to be a soldier than a nagging wife.
Orc 2: True, true...
Orc 1: ... I'm bored.
Orc 2: Me too. Guard duty sucks.
Orc 1: It does.
Orc 2: ...
Orc 1: ...
Orc 2: ...
Orc 1: ... you know, I think I'm going to consider your suggestion of killing my wife. Her nagging voice won't leave my head.
Orc 2: *grins* Good man.

... and it dies there. My orcs got bored.

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In Lothlorien. Frodo offers the Ring to Galadriel. She gets all green and scarry and starts her speech :

GALADRIEL : In place of the Dark Lord you will set up a Queen. And I shall not be dark, but beautiful and terrible as the Morning and the Night! Fair as the Sea and the Sun and the Snow upon the Mountain! Dread...
CELEBORN : GALADRIEL! What are you doing?!
GALADRIEL : *quickly turns back to herself* Um... Nothing! I was... just ...
CELEBORN : You stopped taking your pills again, haven't you darling?
GALADRIEL : I hate them! I can't read minds when I take them, and you know how I like doing that.
CELEBORN : Galadriel, go take you pills, right now, or I'm cutting off your Mirror privileges!
GALADRIEL : You wouldn't ...
CELEBORN : Oh, yes, I would. No more "Rangers", no more "X-Scrolles"...
GALADRIEL : All right, all right! I'll take them! *goes off mumbling something in Quenya*
FRODO :