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 Post subject: I can't believe I'm posting this......
PostPosted: May 27th, 2006, 10:04 pm 
Balrog
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OK, i can't believe I'm posting this, but I am. *takes deep breath* OK, so I've been getting more & more into poetry lately. We've all read Jax Nova's awesome poems (which, believe me, this is not NEAR as good.:)) & they've inspired me to write. Well, I've tried writing poetry before, & it didn't work out so good. I'm open for criticism, help, spelling/grammar errors, w/e to help me.... So erm, ya......here we go.... :confused2:

The Past
A poem by: pip&leggyluvr

The past.
It’s already happened.
It’s already gone.
It’s lost.
And yet,
on it we still dwell.
Wondering,
had we changed it,
what would have happened?
Wishing,
if we could change it,
would it matter?
And in doing so,
Losing,
the time that is now.
Not looking forwards,
but always back.

The past.
It’s already happened.
It’s already gone.
It’s lost.
And yet,
on it we still dwell.
Remembering,
the happy times,
the times that were good.
Wishing,
to go back,
and visit those times again.
And in doing so,
Saddening,
the time that is now.
Making it seem
so much worse,
than perhaps it really is.

The past.
It’s already happened.
It’s already gone.
It’s lost.
And yet,
on it we still dwell.
Missing
the present,
and the future.

The past.
Memories of something
that once existed
but no longer does.

The past
confuses
and consumes
Many.
Does it you?

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: May 29th, 2006, 6:44 pm 
Warden of the Knight
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Nice job. :) I, with all honesty, think it was a nicely writen poem. Very good subject in my opinion as well.

The only thing I could say negative about it is that it did not ryme a lot but that is a personal prefferance and there is no "Should or shouldn't ryme"

Nice job. :)

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: May 30th, 2006, 4:29 am 
Elf
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I like the fact that it doesn't rhyme. It makes the poem flow without seams.
I prefer poems where the author hasn't searched for a rhyming word, and put the poem out of context.

Very well written.

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PostPosted: May 30th, 2006, 3:25 pm 
Balrog
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Wow, thanks u guys!! I didn't think it was that good. lol :-D
Ya, i know wut u mean ShadowStorm.....I like poems that don't rhyme, too. b/c 4 a lot of ppl (not u of course, Jax, b/c ur so good @ it!!! *glares @ jax* :) ) kind of force a rhym, & it doesn't work. But in all honesty, I'm just not talented enough to try & get the right words & make it rhym!!! lol :-D Thanks for the input on it, though, I appreciate it. :bye2:

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PostPosted: May 30th, 2006, 7:45 pm 
Warden of the Knight
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Well, that's not egsactily a bad thing. And some people, as evident by ShadowStorm, like it better without ryms. :)

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PostPosted: May 31st, 2006, 10:42 am 
Balrog
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lol. ya, good thing, huh?? :-D

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PostPosted: June 2nd, 2006, 9:12 pm 
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:) Yeah it's a good thing. :) After all what would the world be like if everyone was the same?! ... :blink:

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: June 3rd, 2006, 12:24 am 
Rider of Rohan
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that was good pip


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PostPosted: June 3rd, 2006, 3:27 pm 
Balrog
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thanks,Kinduali. :)

Jax Nova wrote:
:) Yeah it's a good thing. :) After all what would the world be like if everyone was the same?! ... :blink:


yuck.......very boring. lol :) that would be no fun.....Oh gosh, if every1 was just like me?!?!?! scary thought. 8)

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PostPosted: June 5th, 2006, 6:43 pm 
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lol yeahI would hate it if everyone was the same!

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PostPosted: June 6th, 2006, 5:39 am 
Balrog
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Wow, that's beautiful! I love it!!

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PostPosted: June 6th, 2006, 10:25 am 
Balrog
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thanks. :)

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PostPosted: June 8th, 2006, 8:36 pm 
Travelling Shieldmaiden
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Well done pip&leggyluvr. I love the subject and the repetition you used. I also thought it was well written. Keep it up! :-D

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PostPosted: June 9th, 2006, 10:19 am 
Balrog
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thanks! :-D

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PostPosted: June 9th, 2006, 6:21 pm 
Warden of the Knight
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*grins* told ya you weren't as bad as you said you were.

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PostPosted: June 10th, 2006, 4:06 pm 
Balrog
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*shrugs* I guess not. I hadn't really tried in a while......I mean, i read LotR, & really paid attention 2 thepoetry & luved it, & then my friend told me HE wrote poetry, & then i joined this site & met u, & all of that was a big inspiration for me 2 start, & well, ya.... :-D Still not as good as u, though. ;)

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